Two Major Reasons Why High-Achieving Women Struggle With Alcohol
Learn new tools to help you ditch alcohol and feel good alcohol-free.
It can be hard for successful, high-achieving women to understand why exactly they can’t let go of alcohol. You may be asking yourself this very question. I have my sh*t under control - why is it so hard to let go of this one thing? In this blog, we explore two reasons why alcohol feels like the one thing in your life that you can’t get under control - and how you can break free from it.
The first reason why high-achieving women struggle with alcohol is because of Decision-Making Impairments. The second reason why is Motivation Hijacking.
High-achieving women are used to making decisions and staying motivated. They are driven by success, by goals, by pushing through obstacles, and thrive in environments where their decision-making and motivation are on point. But alcohol disrupts both of these traits.
Over time, your brain starts prioritizing alcohol as a solution to stress, exhaustion, or even just boredom.
Decision-Making Impairments
Do you pride yourself on being a great decision-maker? You weigh the options. You make smart, strategic choices. But here’s the thing, alcohol literally rewires your brain’s ability to make decisions. It messes with your prefrontal cortex, the part of your brain responsible for rational thinking and impulse control.
Over time, your brain starts prioritizing alcohol as a solution to stress, exhaustion, or even just boredom. It learns that a drink equals relief. And before you even realize what’s happening, that glass of wine at the end of the day isn’t really a “decision” anymore - it’s a conditioned response. Your brain recognizes patterns, and eventually certain behaviours, like “rewarding” yourself with a drink to unwind at the end of a long day may turn into a reflex. You don't pause to think about whether you actually want the drink. Instead, your brain just delivers the suggestion on autopilot, and before you even realize it, you’re halfway through the glass.
The troubling part is that oftentimes the more automatic it becomes, the harder it is to see the pattern. You think you’re just making a small decision at the end of a long day, but really, it’s not even a decision anymore. It’s a habit loop your brain has locked onto. And that’s why it feels so hard to stop. It’s not because you’re weak or lack willpower - it’s because your brain has learned this shortcut.
Alcohol hijacks your brain’s dopamine system.
Motivation Hijacking
You’ve built your entire life on motivation. Setting goals, hitting targets, pushing yourself. You don’t just want to succeed - you expect yourself to. But here’s where alcohol screws with that: it hijacks your brain’s dopamine system, the chemical that fuels motivation.
Over time, your brain starts associating alcohol with a reward. Not just any reward, but a shortcut to feeling good. And because your brain is wired for efficiency, it learns to prioritize the fastest way to get dopamine. That’s why the drink at the end of the day feels irresistible, even when you don’t want it. It’s not that you’re unmotivated. It’s that your motivation has been redirected to something that doesn’t actually serve you. This is also known as cheap dopamine, something that Dr. Anna Lembke talks about in her book, Dopamine Nation.
Alcohol artificially boosts dopamine at first, giving you that instant gratification, that Ahh, I deserve this feeling. But as it wears off, it crashes your natural drive. That same brain that woke up ready to conquer the day? Now it’s telling you, Eh, just stay here. Let’s do nothing.
And over time, this pattern builds. That big Saturday energy? It starts to shrink. The runs happen less. The garden gets neglected. The ambitious projects start to fade. And the worst part? You don’t even realize it’s happening. You chalk it up to being tired, to needing a break. But in reality, alcohol is subtly robbing you of your motivation, little by little, weekend by weekend. And if you’ve ever looked around and thought, Why don’t I have the drive I used to? Why do I feel stuck? Alcohol might be why.
You can reclaim control over your brain’s decision-making and motivation.
Reclaiming Control and Finding Freedom
When your brain’s ability to make decisions is impaired, it doesn’t just affect your ability to choose sobriety over alcohol. It also impacts your entire life. You start doubting yourself in areas where you used to be confident. You question your choices, your goals, and the path you’ve worked so hard to create for yourself.
And when your motivation gets hijacked, it’s even worse. Motivation isn’t just about the big wins; it’s about the everyday drive that keeps you moving forward. Without it, even the things you used to love and excel at feel harder. And when alcohol gets in the way of that drive, you start to feel like you’re stuck in a cycle. It’s not that you’re not motivated - it’s just that your motivation has been redirected to something that holds you back, rather than something that moves you forward.
But here’s the good news: you can retrain it. You can get back in the driver’s seat. But first, you have to recognize that right now, alcohol is making those decisions for you.
This is why willpower alone doesn’t work. You’re not failing at sobriety because you’re weak. Your brain has simply been trained to make one choice over and over again. But you can train it to make a different one.
You can reclaim control over your brain’s decision-making and motivation. And this isn’t some magic trick. It’s about understanding that this is a process, and it starts with you deciding that you’re no longer going to let alcohol control your life.
Where it continues is exactly what I teach in my coaching program. You can learn how to rewire your brain so that alcohol isn’t the automatic answer anymore. It starts with boundaries, balancing your needs, and tackling the resentment and limiting beliefs keeping you stuck.
Learn more about my 13-Week Group Coaching Program and find your freedom from alcohol!
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