3 Simple Ways To Bring You Closer To An Alcohol-Free Life

If you are looking for support in living an alcohol-free life, here are three techniques to implement in your daily life to bring you closer to your goals.

1. Remove "I'm never drinking again" from your vocabulary

Stop picturing never drinking again, and start picturing very specific moments in your life where you are no longer drinking alcohol in them. If you have been trying to imagine an entire future without alcohol - holidays, celebrations, big life events, vacations - of course it is going to be overwhelming. Your brain doesn't need a lifetime plan, it needs evidence that specific moments are survivable without alcohol.

Got a big ski weekend planned? Think about what you are going to do after your long day on the slopes. You are not going to indulge in your usual Après-Ski Spritz at the bar, but instead take your boots off, grab an NA beer, and put your feet up. Doesn't that sound relaxing?

Start asking yourself these questions:

• What do my Friday nights look like without alcohol?

• What do I do after a long stressful day at work that doesn't involve alcohol?

• What does going out for dinner look like without alcohol?

2. Separate alcohol from the feeling you are afraid to lose

You might be telling yourself that you are afraid of losing the feeling of relaxation, fun, confidence, connection, or relief. But alcohol is not the source of those feelings. Instead, think of it as a shortcut that might have gotten you there for a brief, temporary visit. When you tell yourself that a life without alcohol will be boring, flat, or even joyless, what you are really picturing is a life where you don't have any relief. But this isn't a lack of alcohol problem, it's a lack of support problem or a how you are taking care of yourself problem.

So whether the sense of security from alcohol is around relief, connection, or that ability to unwind, just because you think that now doesn't mean that it's true. If we want to grow and change we have to challenge our thoughts. So much of what we think, we thought yesterday and the day before. And if we want to grow and change, we have to challenge yesterday's thoughts and say, "just because I'm thinking this right now does not make it true".

Picture yourself doing the thing without drinking:

We need to picture ourselves in the moment, out for dinner with friends while drinking an NA beer. We need to become an observer of how we are feeling. How do I feel right now? Is this even uncomfortable? Are the people I am with drinking? Are they noticing that I am not drinking alcohol?

Picture being at the birthday party and ask yourself how can I feel connected with my friends and family without needing to numb myself? How do I celebrate without checking out halfway through? What does celebration look like when alcohol is not in the picture?

The more you do that, the more you will be feeling comfortable putting yourself in the situation where normally you would drink alcohol and you don't. This practice trains your brain that it's safe to do those things without drinking. It's removing ambiguity from the situation. And so it's preparing you for when you are in the moment - you'll be ready for it and to be more comfortable.

3. Borrow the belief before you have it.

You might not believe that you can actually quit drinking. But I do! Which is why I always tell my clients what I'm about to tell you. Borrow my belief until you believe in yourself. Do it, I dare you. Your brain doesn't need certainty to move forward, what it needs is safety. And this is why community matters so much, and why a strong support system matters so much.

When you hear from other women just like you (high-achievers, career-driven, open, motivated, kind, creative) that are experiencing weekends alcohol-free and reporting back feeling really good about it, or taking their first sober vacation and saying they can't imagine how they spent so many previous vacations so tuned out, that this time they felt so good when they returned - this is when your brain starts to relax a bit. This is what makes picturing your own alcohol-free life so much easier, because you don't have to be able to picture it perfectly, but hearing from other women you know it exists.

Listen To The Stories of Others:

• Find a sober community on social media, maybe something local to you, or like the Sober Girl Society in the UK!

• Start listening to sobriety podcasts

• Read quit lit

• Gain individual support from a Credited Sober Coach who has been where you are now

• Join a 13-week Group Coaching Program with women just like you that will lift you up and hold you accountable

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links, meaning I get a commission if you decide to make a purchase through my links, at no cost to you. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

And remember, Lindsay is a sober coach, not a health professional. If you are chemically dependent on alcohol, consult your doctor on the steps you need to take to safely detox.